Final Post

This is probably going to be the last post I'm making in this blog.

Last month, after having my first breakeven month in three years, I decided to leave Vegas and become a student again. I had a great year playing pro poker financially and lived a lifestyle of extreme comfort; sleeping whenever I wanted, working an average of 28 hours/week, and making more money than basically anyone else around my age that I know (with the exception of one crazy wall street guy). It was also a pretty nutty environment in terms of living the "balla" lifestyle, getting $600 bottles at clubs, getting VIP at strip clubs, etc. etc. (read: colossal waste of money)

The reason I decided to quit was just because poker is so empty. I have gotten to a level where I think I have a really strong mastery of full ring cash no limit hold'em and it is a completely trivial accomplishment. If I continue down this path, I will probably be grinding $10/20 NLHE live within the next year, but I will feel like total shit doing it.

Not only is poker completely devoid of any joy for me any more, but it makes me feel like I'm just absolutely wasting my time. It is very difficult to reconcile the idea as a professional poker player that you are living by basically siphoning off people's wealth and causing them misery. You are doing a service to no one - the world would probably be a better place if you were not in it. Additionally, you are basically crippling your future, leaving vast amounts of empty space in your work history and ensuring that you will not be able to get the job you probably deserve that is in line with your skill set, but rather a much more menial job that can afford to take a risk on you.

You have to really LOVE this game, I mean LOVE it in order to succeed as a pro. I really liked playing poker; I probably thought about poker 90% of the day, listened to poker podcasts, watched videos, read 2+2, read every poker book in my library then every poker book in my bookstore for six years. I didn't love this game enough.

I don't know a single professional poker player that has been playing for 3+ years and is truly in a place where he/she feels happy with life. That is a telling sign; I am talking about a pool of over a thousand players I've met. It's awesome short-term, but it completely wears on you. In all fairness though, these are people that are mid-stakes grinders, making like $30k-100k/year. Maybe when you get really good and are making like $150k+ life gets better (?)

Poker has taught me a lot though and I certainly appreciate it still in certain aspects. I probably never have to worry about getting fired from a job. I have financial security and a safety blanket in that I can always go back to it and make good money. I make better decisions in my life generally by being able to think about situations analytically and weigh the expected value of my decisions.

I am going back to school now to finish up my premed classes and apply to med school. I am really enjoying my classes and being back in an academic environment. I was always very comfortable in school and it feels great to be rewarded for putting in hard work (not the case many times in poker). I'm still playing part-time to cover bills, probably like 15 hours/week or something.

Don't make the same mistake I did. If you love playing poker, harness that joy and just play part-time as a hobby. You can still make serious cash and be a really great player while having the comfort and security of a regular job. It's a completely different life just making your existence about poker. You will keep the love of the game too, which is really the most important thing.

I will still be maintaining my other "life" blog at http://www.xanga.com/anonymousliar if you would like to keep up.

I would love to help people if they are struggling with the game too. If you want to talk poker, shoot me an email at FullTiltAznCutie@gmail.com