I am a Professional Poker Player

I used to love saying that back when I played full-time in 2006. When I made the decision to play full-time and move out to Vegas, I remember the excitement that followed and the feeling that I had to tell the world.

I still remember my first day as a pro. Sitting down at the table, I felt like I owned the place - this was going to be my worksite for the next year and I wanted everyone to know.

"I am a professional poker player," I said breezily while sitting down at my first table as a full-time player. I waited expectantly for the adulation, fear, and awe that my comment would arouse.

"That's nice. I'm a doctor. I save people's lives," my table-mate commented.

"Oh." That was kind of a downer. The rest of the table seemed disinterested. Something must have been wrong! People were supposed to be worshiping me, oohing and aahing. I must not have said it loudly enough!

"Hey guys! Pro here, sitting down!" I said, waving my arms. Still nothing. Eh, what do these guys at $1/2 know anyway?

I proceeded to sit down and play pretty tight for the next couple hours, mentioning that I was a pro no less than 20 times until I got sick of being check-raised and told to shut up. My stack dwindling, I got into a big pot for the rest of my chips. I had ace-high, and I was facing a huge overbet on the river that reeked of busted flush draw bluff.

"I am a pro and we can make these calls! I call!" I announced.

"Full house," my opponent responded, raking in his chips.

"Wait....but...but... I am a pro! Those are supposed to be my chips!"

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After taking a year hiatus, I am back again and this time, older and wiser, I've checked my ego at the door. I only tell people I'm a pro four or five times a session now.